Tag Archives: depression

What-to-Do-if-He-is-Cheating

The Real Reason Why Men & Women Cheat

“Why do men cheat? Because it’s something that they can be successful at when they are feeling unsuccessful at most other things in life.” – Yehuda Berg

I have read numerous articles about why men cheat when the truth is women cheat as well. Now when I speak in regards to “cheating”, I am speaking in regards to those who deceitfully and sneakily go behind their partners backs to entertain and be entertained by another individual.

Keeping in mind that some people are sexually ambitious and prefer an open relationship, or sort of an open relationship (Swinging etc.), those who choose that kind of lifestyle are open about it because they have a different perception. This is an honest approach to the lifestyle one chooses and technically should not be considered cheating.

Let’s define the term cheating. Some of you may or may not agree and that is okay. So I will make it clear that to some peoples standards and perception, cheating is not only the act of physically or sexually involving yourself with another person. For some people, cheating can also be emotional. Cheating is seeking romantic attention by involving yourself with another person unrelated to your partner behind his or her back.  Either way, it is the dishonest part of sharing your vulnerabilities or attention somewhere else romantically that makes it cheating.

So why do we do it? Why do men and women alike become dissatisfied, bored, or curious about the external places to give them happiness? What is it about seeking outside of our personal lives, potentially betraying our sacred loved ones, to find satisfaction elsewhere? What is the REAL reason both men and women cheat? And more importantly, how do we handle it?

The Problem Is Never YOU:  No matter how many articles you read Many people are out of touch with their inner Light, their inner happiness, their peace of mind. We make it a habit to feed our egos by seeking compliments to feel desired. When we have an innate desire to feel good about ourselves we seek acceptance from external sources because we don’t feel adequate or happy with ourselves. Most of us are in a constant state of judgement. Judgement against the world and judgement towards ourselves. We train ourselves to love others and make others happy without looking within, instead of loving ourselves. A person who has not yet discovered how to love and accept themselves, those who are not happy with their path, those who aren’t happy with themselves or their place in life will cheat on you.  It is important to know that this is the NUMBER 1 reason why men and women cheat and this is also why we must NEVER take cheating personally. Even if your partner gets caught or deceives you even more by making you feel that it is your fault for them stepping outside of you, never believe them for they are projecting their insecurities onto you and will only receive temporary satisfaction based on egotistical reasons instead of long term spiritual success. Is that the kind of relationship you want anyway?

To Help us with our thoughts on being committed and faithful, we should…

Always Be Grateful For What You Have: We tend to get complacent, stuck between desire and something we are used to having. Once we no longer have it we start to get those feelings of desire again. It is important to count your blessings if you have something good.  Try to remember why you had those amazing feelings for your partner and try to do exciting things with them. Don’t allow complacency to take over making you for the urge for something different. If you feel like the spark is gone, make sure you bring this up with your partner to try new things. A date jar perhaps is a creative way to do things you love together. Feel free to make it spicy and fun. Try dedicating once a week to go out on a date if possible.

 

Stand-Strong

How To Find Faith During Hard Times

“As your faith is strengthened you will find that there is no longer the need to have a sense of control, that things will flow as they will, and that you will flow with them, to your great delight and benefit.” – Emmanuel Teney 

“You block your dream when you allow your fear to grow bigger than your faith.” – Mary Manin Morrissey

“And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” – Paul Coelho

If deep struggle and discouragement didn’t exist since the beginning of time, then history wouldn’t have took the time to write the story of Job. During the times I feel most defeated, I think of Job’s Story often. Those thoughts usually transition into thinking of others who may have deeper sorrows than I may be experiencing at that moment. Because when we feel really low, we think really low. Our desires to speak negatively becomes first nature. The more bad thoughts, the more depression sinks in essentially making us feel empty.

The question is, how do we step away from the sorrow to see and feel the light? If there is one thing I know to be true, it is the scientific fact that we live and die, there is a time for succeeding and a time for losing, and no matter what we experience, things will always turn around and be okay.

Here Are A Few Things I Do To Keep My Faith When I Am At My Lowest Low:

Speak Positive Thoughts Aloud: When I am feeling defeated with warm tears streaming down my cheeks, I try my best to make room to hear the light within me. I repetitively speak positive affirmations aloud. I simply say things like, “I Have Nothing To Fear, Everything Will Be Okay. I Am Open To All The Goodness That Tomorrow May Bring. The Universe Is On My Side & The Creator Never Wants To See Me Down”.  I practice speaking different positive affirmations as a way to motivate my own spirit. Try saying this Amazing Positive Affirmation daily. It’s my absolute favorite. These positive affirmations can lead straight to prayer.

hardandclearWrite Down Your Fears: Writing down your burdens allows you to express your fears and doubts safely without being judged. Writing is another form of prayer. It helps you release the sadness while relieving your mind from heavy thoughts. When you write, be sure to jot down how you feel and follow it up with, “I trust you, (Creator). So be it!” This gives you confirmation that it will all turn around for the better because you trust it will.

Look To Your Supporters: The people you hold dear to you are the people who support you. You can talk to them about anything and know that they will give you words of encouragement. If you feel like you have little support from people then you can find support in a book, an inspirational website, positive music, therapy groups, or sometimes even a stranger. Be around those who operate out of love so you can feel the light that energy provides.

Trust Yourself: We can be our own worst enemy when our fears take over our minds. You must completely love and trust yourself. Speak highly of yourself hand remember that you are successful and have accomplished so much. We tend to forget we are accomplished in the midst of struggle. You must trust that good things will manifest itself once again and that these struggles are only temporary. Nothing is meant to stay the same forever but it can and will always get better. Be sure to count your blessings.

Everyday is a new opportunity for change and miracles. Be strong, full of faith, and let no situation or person make you feel that it is impossible. The Universe is conspiring for the things you want, ten fold. Believe it!

 

Learning to Let Go

letting go

“Detachment means letting go and non-attachment means simply letting it be.” – Stephen Levine: A Year to Live: How to Live This Year as If it Were Your Last

In the past, if I was hurt by something or fixed on wanting to change something out of my control, I would obsess over the situation for quite some time. Even then, I thought it was foolish of me to hold on to the same thoughts and concerns I’ve had for months. I understood there was absolutely no point in distressing myself with the anticipation of the outcomes in my immediate future. It was holding me back and making me depressed.

With the understanding that the universe was on my side I knew I needed to practice faith and detach from having the desires to control circumstances beyond my control. No one should worry about anything pertaining to their future. The only necessity is to problem solve and focus on the positive. Why fear the unknown and become doubtful? Negative emotions are dangerous to fill your mind with. These defeated emotions are current reflections on what we may go through but everyday changes and new opportunities arise. Love always heals us. Your grudges whether with yourself or with others will disappear and your anger will come to pass. We are all energy made up of the universe and we act accordingly. Some days we understand those around us and other times we are not in tune. It is not natural to feel happy everyday, but what we can do is exercise our thoughts. Thinking positive and letting go of sad thoughts will improve your life in the most amazing way. You create your world and it all starts with you.

My best advice is to Let Go. Be secure and confident that everything will work itself out. If not the way you desire it to, then for the better. Every loss opens new possibilities for growth because every loss initiates change. When we feel we have lost, we hurt because it is our emotional resistance to change. No matter how much we accept intellectually that we must go with the flow, if that flow separates us from what we love, our feelings say, “No!” You must never forget nothing is lost. Nothing will ever be lost. Everything that once happened still exists, has still made its impact and still will somewhere down the line.

By letting go, you are not losing something. Letting go is gaining everything. We are human beings who hold power, we bring about manifestations and miracles. Our minds are powerful and we all have gifts that can heal ourselves and others. You must know that you are a powerhouse and that mistakes do not define you nor anyone else walking this Earth. You must know that you can achieve success and that pure unconditional love heals everything and everyone. Letting go allows us to heal ourselves. We are responsible to be right within ourselves in order to be intuitive and guide ourselves into the places we want to be in. Self discipline is a necessity when trying to learn new things and get to a better place. You are in control of you, your environment and the things that will happen in your future. Let go and let God as they say. Everything always works itself out for the greater for us, especially when we choose better options for our future. Make things beautiful in your life by removing insecurites and worries about the future, talk to the Creator, and you will soon see changes manifest; First in your heart, then your being, then your environment and eventually you will start seeing the outcome in your everyday life. Change always comes about, especially when you’re not expecting it to. And remember, when life gives you lemons…